People with bog-standard (no pun intended) toilets have to pull a stupid chain when they want to flush. The Apple iToilet also has a chain, but try as you might, pulling it won't have any effect. We did the same thing with the eject button on the G4.
But flushing the iToilet is very easy! In fact, the flushing procedure will be very familiar if you've ever used an Apple computer, as it works in much the same way as ejecting a disc or deleting a file. Follow these simple steps for a first class ticket to flushing heaven:

STEP 1: Pick up the items you wish to dispose of (yes, really.)
STEP 2: Drag said items to the waste disposal area.
STEP 3: A message will pop up asking if you really want to delete the items. STEP 4: Click the yes button.
STEP 5: Wash your hands.

*Okay, let's not delude ourselves here. We might not mention it in our advertising, but an iToilet
user will frequently suffer every toilet user's nightmare: Clogging! This is an occurrence that is
particularly common with the iToilet, and you will just have to put up with it! It's not our problem!

Clogging will happen at the most inconvenient of times.You will be happily going about your
'business' when all of a sudden you will be rudely interrupted by the following error message:

Stupid boring idiotic people who choose to use other cheap inferior toilets (such as the ridiculously fast Microsoft "Toilet 2000" or "Loo XP") have to unclog the old-fashioned way - by pressing the "unclog" button. We laugh in their faces because the procedure is just so much quicker and far more fun with the iToilet! To unclog, follow these simple instructions:

STEP 1: When the message box pops up telling you that the iToilet has clogged, simply click the restart button in the dialogue box. Keep clicking this button until you realise that it won't do anything anyway because the iToilet has totally frozen and is not responding. Proceed to Step 2

STEP 2: Press and hold the following keys on your iToilet keypad: Ctrl+Shift+Alt+Command+Esc.
This doesn't do anything either, so proceed to Step 3.

STEP 3: Restart your iToilet by inserting a straightened paperclip into the restart pin-hole. This is located in a hard to reach place at the back of the iToilet. The paperclip will break and get stuck in the pin-hole, invalidating your warranty. Proceed to step 4.

STEP 4: Carefully lift the toilet seat. Close it, then lift it again. Nothing will happen. Proceed to Step 5.

STEP 5: Place your hand in amongst the muck that is clogging up the pipe.

STEP 6: Simply feel around for another tiny pin-hole which is also hidden away in a difficult to reach place and push another straightened paper clip firmly into the pin hole. Because you have your hand submerged in water and are touching metal you will be electrocuted.
This is not Apple's problem and we insist that the pin-holes are a good design feature and are part of our "Think Different" policy. You might want to have a look at "Apple Care"
which now includes life insurance (please note that death by electrocution is not covered.) Proceed to Step 7.

STEP 7: The iToilet will suddenly restart by itself for no apparent reason, and even though you are "bursting to go" you must wait patiently for it to load (this is really really really slow when compared to other toilets, but hey, the iToilet looks funky and there's a cute little smiley face for you to look at while it loads!) Once the iToilet has (finally) loaded it will still be clogged. Wash your hands and proceed to Step 8.

STEP 8: Proceed to Step 1.

For more information regarding the iToilet contact Electric Chicken (Stephen Murray)
The e-mail address is ruffledfeathers@electric-chicken.co.uk
or visit http://www.raytracer25.btinternet.co.uk/index.html

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